Latvia, I could be big in Latvia. At 49, I'm still almost two decades her senior. As a matter of fact I have a birthday coming up and I wrote this email some friends. It shows how full of shit I am. I could have said it in four words: I'm having another birthday. instead I wrote the following:
Dear Boys,
Suddenly, I peer into real life and I notice that in a mere two weeks I will have completed my penultimate year as a sexagenarian and I'll be commencing, here on Planet Earth, the salaciously suggestive numbered 69th year...69... a double entendre integer if ever there were one.
The thought has occurred to me that I should stop traveling around the world chasing young women, etc. That I'm too old to be living this untamed, disorderly life. . Perhaps it's time I enter adulthood with it's requisite appropriate stability and routine.
But unfortunately it was only a fleeting thought. It seems that those cryptic forces that direct me in my life adventures are stubbornly resistant to that common sensical idea.
Oh well. As the Red Sox fans used to say and the Cubbies' fans still say, "Maybe next year."
Love Richie
All these ladies that contact me are simply confusing me. My dearest, oldest friends advise me to return to LA and find a fortyish divorcee, preferable one who is wealthy and plays golf.
These are suggestions to be considered.
I am currently between fortunes and my constant golf cry on the golf course is
Of course when I last played, it was with two dentists, is it a surprise that they kept shouting after each iron shot, "Bite! Bite!"
Okay, enough bad, but true jokes. I am trying to enlist the services of a professional video taping company in Massachusetts to tape my "gig" for my High School's 5oth class reunion. I want to be able to post it on this blog to further punish you, my dear reader.
Well I'm off to the River Palace for the special concert tonight. I'll probably play some blackjack at the casino there and if I win $300 maybe I can buy a wife. They are goooood lookin.
Love to all and as Roy Rogers used to close with, "May the good lord take a likin to ya." I always loved Roy Rogers as a matter of fact I always thought that my ex girlfriend that I am almost over (18 years now), looked a lot like Roy...in his youth. Don't get me wrong, I'm a flaming hetero, but women have been my downfall.
After about 3 and a half years all my girl friends always say to me, "All you ever want from me is sex!!!"Puzzled by this, I respond with , "No. Not just you!!!"
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